


Ambivalence

by Knowledge_Eater



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-05-15 22:55:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14799551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Knowledge_Eater/pseuds/Knowledge_Eater
Summary: He knew she was different, she was doing her best to be accepted and loved, to feel like she was special.  So upon their final confrontation he couldn't kill her, couldn't leave her to die in that river.  Time would tell if he'd grow to regret his decision.





	1. A Choice

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Ubisoft owns Far Cry 5, I just like to play with their world and characters.

Aiden knew it wasn’t real. The Bliss was a hallucinogen. He knew everything wasn’t real. Faith with wings and flying. The green orbs of light that she threw at him. When he touched one of them it looked like it melted the skin from his bones. Initially it hurt like hell, but once the panic subsided and he was hit by another green orb he felt nothing.

Still there were some things in the Bliss that he didn’t want to ignore, the cult followers being one of them. They had guns. But they evaporated into mist should he shoot or swing at them with his AKM.

 

It was difficult to tell how long he had been battling Faith. He had walked, ran, swam, and drove more in the last few days than he ever had in his entire life. But there was no denying that the experience toughened him more than the training he underwent for his deputy position. With that said he wasn’t sure if the last few days were finally catching up to him or this encounter was lasting so long that the adrenaline was starting to ebb away. His muscles were beginning to feel a little stiff which resulted in him moving slower.

 

The rookie deputy took another swing at a nearby Peggie, the name the locals had for the cult members, and distinctly heard the satisfying slap of metal against flesh. Whether it was a hallucination or not, he took advantage and lifted his rifle to take the shot.

 

_Click._

 

Aiden cursed. Of all times for his clip to run dry! The Peggie was already moving and he didn’t want to miss this opportunity, it was the first time he felt anything solid in the Bliss. He wasn’t sure if he had any extra clips for his AKM, so he settled for pulling out his pistol. Before he could properly aim he fired a few blind shots. One of the shots hit true. He almost missed it, but between shots he heard a yelp. The adrenaline came back, the aches and pains of his own wounds faded and it wasn’t so difficult to keep moving anymore.

 

His foot slid on a short slope and his ankle suddenly felt cold and wet. The battle between him and Faith was over a field of flowers, there was no sight of water or even a puddle. This was good, the Bliss was weakening.

 

The Peggie he shot vanished and nothing else attacked him. Faith herself wasn’t in sight, but he could still hear her voice. With some sense of satisfaction, he could hear the strain it took her to speak. Was she really that Peggie that he shot?

 

Without having to dodge and shoot and run for his life, he was able to fully focus on her voice and the things she was saying. She spoke about not being at fault, that Joseph, the cult’s leader, forced her to be this way.

 

_Lies,_ he immediately thought. He was aware of Faith’s reputation. Similar to Joseph, she knew how to talk to people, knew how to get people to empathize, and then she took advantage.

 

Still, his chest tightened in sympathy.

 

Ever since he encountered Faith, since he helped the resistance slowly take control of her territory, she told him her little sob story. A history of abuse and loneliness. He understood then the reason for her joining the cult, to find acceptance. It made sense, and in a way he wasn’t able to hate her as much as he hated the other cult heralds, the sadistic John and sociopathic Jacob.

 

But now?

 

Now, he wasn’t sure he hated her at all.

 

_Stop,_ he mentally scolded himself. This had to be her ploy, to plant a seed of doubt in him. He couldn’t afford to sympathize for her now. She may not have physically pulled the trigger that murdered Hope Country’s mayor and the hundreds of other people that were killed, but she still orchestrated their deaths.

 

Aiden blinked and suddenly he noticed a silhouette stumbling about in his peripheral vision. By the time he focused on the shadow it was gone. He blinked again and what was an empty field of flowers around him became a cluster of trees. As quickly as the trees appeared they were gone and replaced by the flowers.

 

The Bliss continued to lose its effects on him, and Faith knew it. She shouted something, but he paid her no mind. He continued to focus on the group of trees that were several feet in front of him a few seconds ago. He took another step and felt the cold wetness reach just below his knee. He focused on the feel of the water.

 

Every blink seemed to drive the Bliss away. Trees, bushes, even a river bank melted into view and remained in place. The silhouette stood before him now and then the short, white dress appeared. Aiden blinked hard and finally he found himself looking at Faith, face to face at last.

 

He was taken aback for a moment when he saw her face. The only time he met Faith that wasn’t in the Bliss was when he arrested Joseph. Her face was swollen, her left eye socket was already dark and bruised, and blood caked her right cheek, just next to her mouth.

 

There was no one else around them, alive or not. So that whole battle in the Bliss, he faced her and her alone the entire time. His chest clenched in pity again. When he faced Jacob and John they were both surrounded by their followers. They had backup. But Faith was alone against him. The hallucinations caused by the Bliss gave her an advantage, but if she had the Peggies helping her he’d no doubt be dead right now.

 

Did she have to stop him alone in order to redeem herself to Joseph?

 

Movement snapped him out of his thoughts and he saw her reaching for him, a look of longing twinkling in her eyes. By instinct, his body jerked back and barely avoided contact by her outreached hand. His hand twitched, he wanted to reach for the gun at his holster. It was then that he realized his handgun was absent from his grip. But he didn’t need it, he could see now that Faith wasn’t armed. There were no weapons nearby other than his empty AKM a few feet behind her, on the other side of the river.

 

Faith didn’t move, didn’t speak. An array of emotions crossed her face as she slowly lowered her hand. Shock melted into disappointment, and then sadness. No, it wasn’t sadness, he thought. It was despair. Then there was other movement, a nod of her chin and then a new emotion on her face, acceptance.

 

The resistance, and himself included, believed Faith to be a liar. She said all the right things to make people believe her, and then she manipulated them. But all the emotions that she displayed so quickly seemed too genuine, too real. His chest was no longer clenched, but a heaviness settled in it.

 

She moved away from him and that’s when he noticed her limp. His eyes drifted down and he saw more blood. Rivulets of blood snaked down her right leg. With one final warning about Joseph, she threw herself more than collapsed into the river. She was floating, her face slightly above the water surface. And then her head turned so that her mouth and nose were under the water.

 

_Is she dead,_ he thought. With the blood and her dress, he couldn’t see where he had shot her, couldn’t tell if he hit an artery. It was possible she passed out from blood loss. And now with her face under water she’d soon drown.

 

Dread hit him. And guilt. But he should feel satisfied, right? He avenged the mayor and all those people that died at the jail. He avenged the Marshall. With Faith’s death all of the cults heralds were down, and all that was left to destroy the cult was to arrest its leader.

 

He was starting to feel lightheaded and the edges of his vision became slightly clouded. He looked down and noticed a few Bliss flowers near his feet. He took a step away and gave one final glance at Faith’s body. One moment her body floated, her face looking almost serene and peaceful, and then her body evaporated into a stream of light that homed in towards his feet. His eyes followed the light and watched as it settled into one of the Bliss flowers.

 

It seemed fitting that she would rest as a flower, even if it was a hallucinogenic. His body moved on its own accord and he found himself bent over and then he plucked the flower. Then he tossed it into the river.

 

It was a long walk back to the jail. Hopefully he’d find a Peggie vehicle to steal. His body ached, but thankfully his wounds were no worse than a few bruises and scratches. He thought back to the confrontation with Faith, how was she planning on killing him if she didn’t have any weapons?

 

Aiden fell deep in thought and stopped walking suddenly. Did she plan on killing him? Then he remembered all the things she told him upon first encountering her and of their numerous meetings afterward. She thought she could save him, the same way she felt Joseph saved her.

 

He shook his head and continued walking. If what she said about Joseph forcing her to serve him was true, then she didn’t realize that she and he shared the same enemy. It was too bad she was beyond saving. Joseph had her too brainwashed and devoted to him, just like the rest of his followers. Suddenly, he stopped walking.

 

_Don’t think about it. Don’t think about it._

 

He thought about it.

 

A wave of guilt hit him. Another bout of adrenaline fueled his tired muscles and he was running back to the river. With the tiny remnants of the Bliss out of his system, he saw Faith was still in the water.

 

The rookie all but jumped into the cold water and lifted Faith up. He didn’t hear her gasp in breaths, didn’t see her chest move.

 

This was bad.

 

He quickly placed her down on the hard ground, it was more rocks and dirt than sand. It was a good thing one of his work requirements was to be trained and certified in CPR, and with the wildlife that was common in the county he had some basic training in first aid as well.

 

After plotting her demise for so many days, it was strange to feel relieved upon feeling a heartbeat. But it was very faint. He grew worried when she failed to respond to the rescue breathing after what felt like several minutes, but that faint heartbeat remained. And then she was gasping and coughing. When the coughs turned into chokes, he pulled her onto her side. He didn’t mind when she coughed out water onto his lap.

 

Once her coughs and spluttering subsided, her eyelids fluttered open. Blue eyes looked around but were quick to focus on him, then they narrowed in confusion. Before Aiden could say anything she winced and his thoughts immediately went to her bullet wound.

 

Faith’s leg was coated in blood, and to see so much of it made him worried. First, he had to stop the bleeding, or at the very least slow it down. He’d worry about where to take her later.

 

He didn’t have any bandages. The thought to rip his shirt for makeshift bandages immediately crossed his mind. His shirt wouldn’t be the cleanest, it was damp with sweat and water from the river, but it was important he stop the bleeding. As he unbuttoned his red plaid shirt Faith seemed coherent enough to speak.

 

“Why?” Her voice was weak and she looked like she was having difficulty keeping her eyes open.

 

Aiden was no doctor, or even a medic, but he’d seen enough movies and shows to know that it was bad for a person to sleep after losing a lot of blood. Well, he hoped there was some truth behind that, at least.

 

“I need you to stay awake, okay,” he told her as he ripped a strip from the bottom of his shirt.

 

Her eyebrows knotted together in a frown for a quick moment before her face twisted into another grimace when Aiden wiped aside the blood on her leg. She gasped from the sudden pain, but didn’t cry out. With some of the blood out of the way he immediately found the small circle in her flesh. He balled up a strip of his shirt and pressed it as hard he could against the wound. This time Faith did cry out, which brought that familiar twinge of guilt in his chest.

 

The red material quickly soaked up even more red that it looked black. But when he swapped for a new strip he noticed the wound wasn’t leaking as much blood anymore. He applied pressure on the her leg again and suddenly felt like an idiot for not checking for an exit wound. He gingerly lifted her leg, which caused Faith to bite her lip to keep from crying out, and inspected the back of her thigh.

 

The deputy breathed a sigh of relief when he found the exit wound, the bullet went straight through. And if the blood was lighting up then an artery wasn’t hit. Okay, so far so good. He applied pressure to both wounds and had to nudge Faith awake several times. Her slipping in and out of consciousness was worrying him. Once he was satisfied with the lack of the bleeding, he tore the rest of his shirt and wrapped the strips tightly around her thigh. Now that her wound was taken cared of, he thought of the next bridge he would have to cross.

 

Where would he take Faith now?

 

The County Jail just barely survived an attack from Faith. Numerous people didn’t make it. It would be very possible numerous people wouldn’t be accepting if Aiden were to show up with an injured Faith. Even more probably wouldn’t approve of sharing their medical supplies and medicine for her.

 

The young rookie rubbed his face in exasperation. Okay, so maybe he didn’t plan this all the way through. For now, he stood up and carefully lifted Faith. He still wasn’t sure exactly where he was. So he picked a direction and started walking. Hopefully he’d come across a street. Or an abandoned vehicle. He had that much time to plan what the hell he was going to do. He had even more time to figure out why he even spared Faith, it would’ve been so much easier to leave her to die in the river.

 

Sometimes Aiden thought things would be so much easier if he was just inherently good.


	2. Shelter

Ambivalence

Chapter 2: Shelter  
By: Knowledge Eater  
Disclaimer: Ubisoft owns Far Cry 5, I just like to play with their world and characters.

* * *

 

  
If Aiden could enter the lottery, he’d no doubt win the jackpot with the luck he had going for him.

  
First, heading in a random direction paid off. He found a road, it wasn’t a busy one since a single car had yet to drive by, but it helped give him an idea of where to go. Not long after he walked down the road he found an abandoned car. It wasn’t in the best shape, one side of the vehicle was riddled with bullet holes, the windshield was cracked, and the hood of the car had the word SINNER spray painted on it. But it worked, the keys were still in the ignition, and it had over half a tank of gas.

  
It was odd to see a car attacked in such a manner in Faith’s region, they were more normal up north in the Whitetail Mountains. Regardless, he was damn happy for a working car. The adrenaline long since drained away and it was a struggle to keep carrying Faith, light as she was.

  
With Faith in the passenger seat, Aiden drove about half a mile by the time he thought of what he should do. He could head back to the county jail or find shelter elsewhere. The Cougars were well stocked at the jail, they had plenty of food, water, and most importantly medicine. They also had the closest thing to a doctor, he was a veterinarian but he knew enough medical stuff to keep people alive when they got hurt. Luckily, he was one of the few that hadn’t been taken or injured when the Peggies attacked the place.  
Bad thing was, with the attack being so recent, he doubted anyone would be in a calm state of mind if they saw Faith. He wouldn’t be able to protect her alone, and he wasn’t in the mood to argue with anyone against her presence either. The more he thought on it, the better it seemed to seek out another place to rest. Maybe he could find a bunker, just about every single one he found was stock full of supplies.

  
He glanced at the woman beside him and panicked when he saw her eyes were closed, her chin touching her chest.

  
“Hey!” He grabbed at her shoulder and shook her. When she failed to respond he slammed on the brakes. Thankfully he had remembered to put the seatbelt on her, if he hadn’t she probably would have flown out of the windshield, or at least face plant it. But the sudden jolt seemed to have jarred her back to consciousness. She let out a soft groan before her eyes fluttered open. With a grimace, she lifted her head and promptly glared at him.

  
Good. He’d be worried if she woke up and was confused. If she was angry enough at him to glare at him then it meant she wasn’t in too bad of shape.

  
“What did we agree on,” Aiden asked. “No naps.” The woman didn’t respond, but she didn’t ignore him either.

  
They were on the road for several minutes before the deputy finally found a dirt road. He still hadn’t recognized the area so that meant they weren’t too close to the County Jail. The dirt road took them far enough into the woods that led to a small cabin, a cluster of trees hid the dwelling from the main road.

  
The cabin looked abandoned, there was no sign of any movement, no vehicles, no animals. Still, Aiden didn’t trust to barge in. He left Faith in the car, but took the car keys with him. Just in case someone was still living in the cabin, he knocked on the door and waited a moment. When no one answered, and he failed to see any movement from the window, he tested the doorknob and was faintly surprised to find it unlocked.

  
The deputy stepped inside with his pistol in hand. “Hello,” he called out. The cabin had a small living room, a kitchen, a bedroom and a bathroom. Whoever lived there seemed to have been in a hurry to leave, the place was messy and there was a forgotten suitcase filled with clothes on the bed. None of the windows were broken, the door was unlocked but not damaged, so no one tried to break in. There was food in the fridge and pantry. Aiden felt like he struck gold when he found a first aid kit in the bathroom.

  
He had left Faith alone in the car long enough. The sooner he brought her in and bandaged her leg properly the sooner he could rest. And eat. He was starving.

  
With the little time that he spent in the cabin, Faith managed to walk halfway back to the street. She heard the door close when he stepped outside and she stopped walking, her head tilted down in acceptance of getting caught trying to escape.

  
“So you were just going to leave without saying goodbye?” Aiden called out.

  
She didn’t respond, not that he expected her to. He stepped next to her and noticed her shoulders stiffen, she still kept her eyes downcast too. It was odd to see her submissive. Then again, he wasn’t under the influence of the Bliss so she was powerless against him. But after a moment she looked up at him.

  
“Are you…forcing me to go with you?” She asked, her voice soft and almost difficult to hear over the constant chirping of birds nearby.

  
It was then that Aiden felt a coldness sweep through him and his stomach dropped to his feet. Technically, Faith never avoided going with him. But now she was trying to leave, and if he were to force her to remain with him that would technically be kidnapping. Even though Aiden long since abandoned his uniform to avoid detection from the Peggies, he had kept his belt to store ammo and he still had his handcuffs. To keep Faith with him he would have to arrest her.

  
The question was, what could he arrest her for? Sure, she had the reputation for being a manipulator. Through the Bliss she manipulated countless people to assault, kidnap and murder others. But he had no proof of it. As it was he had no idea how she was even able to manipulate people through the hallucinogen.

  
With a deep breath, the junior deputy stepped in front of the shorter woman. He was aware that her name wasn’t Faith, but he found no need to display that knowledge just yet. It was difficult to explain, but he felt that it was important that she be the first to come forth about her real name. “Forcing you? No…well, uh, not exactly.” He reached for the back of his belt and pulled out his handcuffs. “However, you are under arrest for the making and distribution of an illegal substance.” It was the best thing he could think of. There was plenty of evidence and witnesses that would point her as being the one in charge of the Bliss. With the active ingredient in the hallucinogen, it would obviously be an illegal substance.

  
Different emotions twirled in Faith’s blue eyes. The corner of her bloodied lip curled, but she didn’t laugh. But he could see the flash of fear in her eyes. With a sigh, Aiden stuffed his cuffs back into the pouch. “You’re officially under arrest, but I won’t handcuff you. You’re hurt. But if you try to escape again then I will have no choice but to handcuff you anyway, injured or not. Understood?” The humor vanished from her face, but her eyes narrowed in a small glare.

  
He waved towards the cabin behind her. “Would you rather walk or should I carry you?” She continued to remain silent, but she turned and slowly limped towards the cabin. Aiden almost whistled as he watched her. He had been shot in the leg once, when he was still up north in the Whitetail region. It hurt like a bitch and he wasn’t able to walk for days. So to see Faith walking merely an hour or two after getting shot impressed him.

  
She only managed to get to the door of the cabin before she swayed and leaned against the doorframe. He let her have her moment of pride, but he really didn’t want her to injure herself further. He couldn’t afford to take her to any of the clinics that were still open, most of them worked for the Peggies.

  
He stepped next to her again, but he didn’t pick her up just yet. “Come on, you’re dead on your feet,” he told her. Once she nodded, he placed an arm under her knees and gently scooped her up, she gasped at the sudden movement.

  
It was an understatement to say that it felt odd to walk into a small home with one of the cult’s heralds in his arms bridal style. He cursed when he felt the warmth of her blood on her leg as he carried her into the bedroom.

  
“It’s cold.”

  
Aiden almost didn’t hear her, her voice was soft and rough sounding. Then what she said registered and he frowned in confusion. The sun was still out and it was a fairly warm day, plus all the windows were shut, so the cabin was a little stuffy. Then the problem of what she said registered.

  
Crap, he thought. He knew enough about blood loss to know it was bad if the injured person started to feel cold. He studied her face and realized she looked a little pale.  
He sighed audibly while he laid her on the bed and then searched for a blanket. “You know,” he said, “if you didn’t try to stretch out your legs you wouldn’t be bleeding again.” He was glad the cabin’s owner stashed two thick blankets in the bedroom closet. Despite the abandoned suitcase that was on the bed there were still quite a few clothes hanging in the closet. They were all men’s clothes, but at least they were dry and clean.

  
He returned to Faith and covered her with one of the blankets, but left her bleeding leg exposed. He used the other blanket to prop her injured limb so it was elevated above the level of her heart. With clean gauze from the first aid kit, Aiden applied pressure to both bullet holes in her leg to stop the bleeding again. Just like the first time he did this Faith couldn’t stifle a yelp. Hearing her cry out made his chest tighten in guilt again. When the bleeding stopped, he did his best to clean her leg with some disinfectant before he finally bandaged her up.

  
Satisfied with his work, Aiden gave a gentle pat on the woman’s shoulder. He felt her muscle stiffen. “Easy,” he told her. “I’m not going to hurt you, ya know. I wouldn’t have bothered saving you. Or patching you up.”

  
Again, she remained silent and pulled the blanket to her chin. If not for her leg she probably would have rolled so her back was to him.  The deputy sighed again. He couldn’t blame her for her silence and obvious fear around him, they did just try to kill each other.

  
_But she had no weapons._

  
Okay, so while she may not have tried to kill him, he did try to kill her. Almost succeeded too.

  
“I’ll be right back.” He packed up the first aid kit and set it on the nearby end table. There was a digital clock on it that reported the time as 5:17 pm. That explained why he felt hungry enough to eat a cow, he couldn’t remember when was the last time he ate. Before he left the room, however, he pulled a gray blue button down shirt from the closet and tossed it to Faith. The shirt looked large enough to cover her just as much as her dress.

  
“The shirt is dry and clean, which is something I can’t say about your dress. Get changed so you can warm up.” He stepped into the bathroom to wash the blood from his hands. It really did worry him of how much blood she’s lost. He poked his head back into the bedroom and found her dozing off again. “No sleeping!” She startled and glared at him again.

  
With a grin, Aiden headed for the small kitchen. It was messy with forgotten cans and water bottles littered on the counters and cabinets left open. Whoever lived here knew how to eat. The pantry was filled with all sorts of snacks, specifically sweets. Aiden was guilty of having a sweet tooth, and he couldn’t remember the last time he had anything to satisfy it. First day on the job and he didn’t so much as get a donut. He honestly had been looking forward to eating donuts all day every day when he got the deputy position.

  
A small handful of cookies were immediately stuffed into his mouth as he searched deeper into the pantry and the fridge. Snacks were great, but both he and Faith would need real food to help them heal, especially with all the blood Faith lost.

  
It looked like the owner was smart enough not to take the perishables, but there was still plenty of canned food. He’d cook up a real meal later after he’d get some sleep. For now, he didn’t trust Faith to be alone for too long. It wasn’t that he was worried she’d manage to escape, she wouldn’t be able to get far, but he was more concerned of her injuring herself further. She was cold and pale, so she was just one step away from falling into shock. His first aid knowledge fell short of knowing how to deal with that.

  
The junior deputy returned to the bedroom with a plate of waffles and a glass of orange juice. He couldn’t find any syrup for the waffles, and yes he knew that eating waffles without syrup was a sin, but they were chocolate chip waffles at least.

  
Faith had changed into the shirt, her dress sat neatly folded on the edge of the bed. She was massaging her injured leg, but immediately pulled her hand away when he entered the room. She stared at the plate of waffles as he approached her, but when he offered the food to her she shook her head.

  
“Hey,” he said gently. He couldn’t stand to remain on his feet any longer so he sat on the edge of the bed. Fear flashed in her eyes and she leaned back against the headboard. It was easy to forget that the woman before him was the enemy, she manipulated people to murder innocents, forced the Bliss onto people until they became an empty husk. But now, she was powerless and terrified of him.  
He avoided touching her and he moved slowly. The last thing he wanted was for her to jar her wound and make it bleed again. He offered her the plate again.  
“You need to eat. It’ll help with the blood you lost.”

  
She eyed the food again, and then she glanced at the orange juice in his other hand. He offered the cup to her and she didn’t need any convincing to take it. She immediately drank and in a few gulps she was done. Once her thirst was taken cared of, she finally seemed interested in the food. One bite turned into three quick ones. Then it was like she was trying to eat everything she could before he could take the food away. Seeing her act this way made his chest tightened in sorrow. Maybe there was some truth about her story regarding Joseph drugging and threatening her until she submitted to him.

  
“Easy there,” he smiled at her. “Don’t want you to get sick.” He took the empty plate and cup from her. “Would you like more?”

  
She seemed to hesitate to answer for a moment, her blue eyes had a haze that was often caused by pain. “Just the juice,” she finally replied.

  
With a nod, Aiden got up and left to fetch the beverage. When he returned he caught Faith massaging her leg again. He’d have to find some painkillers for her later, he didn’t find any in the bathroom. He handed her the drink and walked around to the other side of the bed where her injured leg rested. The gauze had a small red blot, but it looked fine otherwise.

  
“Does it hurt?” Aiden shook his head. He hadn’t meant to ask that. When he got tired he tended to say really dumb things. “Scratch that. Of course it hurts.” He glanced at Faith and noticed her studying him, the now empty cup cradled between her hands. “How are you feeling?”

  
Faith frowned as she continued to study him. “You’re the one that shot me, but you want to know if I’m all right?” The wrinkle between her eyebrows vanished and she brought a hand up to rub her eyes. “I’m…the food helped. I think.”

  
Aiden ignored her snap, the woman was tired and in tremendous pain after all. Plus if this whole thing felt awkward for him it must feel ten times worse for her. “That’s good,” he told her. He took the empty cup from her and set it on the floor.

  
All the deputy wanted to do was get some sleep. The couch in the other room was calling his name, but he didn’t trust to leave Faith alone. The cabin had no backdoor, but there was a small window in the bedroom that she could fit through. If she snuck out the window he wouldn’t hear her from the other room.

  
Handcuffing her to the bed was out of the question. Well, he was too tired to care about sleeping on the floor. It wouldn’t be the worst thing he’s slept on recently.

  
“Do you still feel cold?” Faith didn’t meet his eyes, but she shook her head. They sat in silence for a moment, Aiden debated on what to say to break the awkward silence, and Faith kept glancing at him looking like she wanted to say something but continued to remain silent. Her face was really swollen and he wondered if that made it difficult for her to speak.

  
It had only been a few minutes since she ate, but he could see some color returning to her cheeks. He’d have to trust her word that she was no longer feeling cold. Aiden left for the kitchen again and returned with a small towel wrapped around some ice. “Here. This will help with the swelling.”

  
Faith took the towel and hissed when she pressed it against her blackened eye. She would alternate between placing the ice on her eye, the bridge of her nose, and her right cheek. She looked more exhausted than he felt, but he still didn’t trust to let her sleep just yet.

  
“I’m really tired,” she whispered. Her words slurred with exhaustion. “Why won’t you let me sleep? You must be tired too. I won’t try to run away, I promise.”

  
Aiden smiled sadly. “I can’t let you do that, Faith. I’m sorry.”

  
“Why?”

  
“You’ve lost too much blood, so your body is already having a difficult enough time getting what it needs through your system. And when we sleep our heart rate and breathing decrease. So if you were to sleep, well…you may not wake up.”

  
Faith pondered on the information for a moment. She rubbed her eyes again. “I’m…touched that you care for me.” A small smile grew on her swollen face. Aiden felt a warmth on his arm and looked down to see Faith’s hand rested on top of it. “It’s not too late.”

  
The deputy shook his head in confusion. “What isn’t too late?”

  
Faith’s smile widened. “We can go back. The Father is a forgiving man. You kept me alive when you didn’t have to. You said so yourself, you could have left me there to die.” Her hand squeezed his arm gently.

  
Aiden almost wanted to laugh, but he didn’t want to offend Faith. Upsetting her would only entice her to escape again, and he really wanted to sleep, even just for a few hours. He glanced down at her hand that still held his arm, and then he looked up at her smiling face. “Tell me, Faith, truthfully. I killed the Father’s own brothers. Do you think he’ll forgive two deaths because I saved one?”

  
The smile was gone from her face, but she didn’t respond. Aiden spoke before she could anyhow. “Did the Father forgive you for not stopping me from destroying his statue?” He hated to see her look away from him, her expression pained. “You threw everything you could at me to stop me. You did your best. But I still burned his book. Did he still forgive you?”

  
He meant to offer her a small comfort, he reached over and patted her shoulder, but he still felt her stiffen at his contact. She pulled away from him as much as her anchored leg could allow. It saddened him that she was afraid of a simple act of comfort, and he didn’t think it was because he shot her under the influence of the Bliss.

  
“Your silence answers my question. I’m sorry, I can’t take you back. There’s no forgiveness for me.” He sat up and stretched, then he glanced at the clock next to the bed. “It’s getting late and we’re both exhausted. Get some sleep, Faith.”

  
Once the okay was given, she leaned back against the pillow and seemed to have immediately fallen asleep. Aiden watched her as long as he could, he was afraid to see her suddenly stop breathing. He had dozed off eventually, but he was unsure for how long. Faith was still breathing and there looked to be no other problems, there was no increase of blood on the bandage.

  
Finally satisfied, the junior deputy got as comfortable as he could on the wooden floor and promptly fell asleep.

* * *

 


End file.
